I’m a hopeless romantic.
I have this Eden-esque fantasy where all of the cords to all my hardware are neatly wrapped and labeled and managed and stored out of view.
I often spend entire afternoons with ties and clips and other doodads, attempting to construct this utopia.
And I always fail. Like I did today.
- Powerstrip #1
- Powerstrip #2
- Powerstrip #3
- USB 2.0 #1 drive power pack and power cord
- USB 2.0 #1 USB cable to USB hub
- USB 2.0 #2 drive power pack and power cord
- USB 2.0 #2 USB cable to USB hub
- USB 2.0 #3 drive power pack and power cord
- USB 2.0 #3 USB cable to USB hub
- USB hub to desktop cable
- USB hub power pack and cable
- Router power cable
- Router to DSL Modem cable
- Router to Desktop Ethernet cable
- Router to Laptop Ethernet cable
- DSL Modem power cable
- DSL to DSL Filter cable
- DSL Filter to phone jack cable
- Telephone headset to keypad cord
- Telephone keypad to DSL filter cable
- Telephone recording adapter to DSL filter cable
- Telephone recording adapter to Olympus digital recorder cable
- Olympus digital recorder to USB hub cable
- Laptop power cable to laptop and to powerstrip
- Laptop USB 2.0 PCMIA card with power cord into existing USB slot on laptop
- Printer to desktop USB cable
- Printer power cord
- iPod to desktop cable
- Keyboard to USB hub cable
- Mouse to Keyboard USB cable
- Computer speakers power cord
- Subwoofer to desktop cord
- Channel left speaker to subwoofer cord
- Channel right speaker to subwoofer cord
- Audio controller to subwoofer cord
- LCD panel power cord
- LCD panel to desktop power cord
- DVD burner power cable
- DVD to USB hub power cable
- iSight to Desktop Firewire cable
- Mac Mini power cord and power adapter
- Cellphone charger
- (waiting) USB headset/mic
- (waiting in other room) Multi-channel sound mixing board
- (waiting in other room) Unidirectional microphone
- (waiting in other room) Audio compressor and bord
- (waiting in closet) KORG n-360 keyboard
- (and I could even count the entertainment area:) TV power cable, TV to DVD cables, PS2 power cable, PS2 controller cables, VCR power cable, TV to VCR cable, DVD speaker cables (five channels + subwoofer)
- (almost forgot) My cable cable! For cable TV!
The part that really makes Baby Jesus cry is the adapters that don’t have a cord from the adapter to the plug – you can’t plug those MFs in alongside the rest of the setup into the powerstrips – requiring you to get more powerstrips. I think I need to start wearing one of those monitors that X-ray techs where that can tell you how much radiation you’re absorbing each day.
I next hare-brained scheme would be to make a net or black mesh sheet that acts like an envelope/bag to contain all of this mess and hide it out of view. Or mount a wooden box painted black with a lid on the back of the computer desk to just throw all this stuff in and then have a few holes where the cords can come out.
Wi-fi. My ass, wi-fi.
Paperless office? Cordless office? Don’t make me laugh.
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